Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Post Op

I had my post op appointment today.  It's been 19 days since my surgery and I finally feel great!  The past few weeks, people kept asking if I'm ok emotionally.  I would always say yes and truthfully thought so, even feeling bad that I wasn't more upset... until today.  As I sat in the waiting room, I watched pregnant lady after pregnant lady walk through the door.  I started tearing up.  I would be around 11 weeks.  When they put me in my room, I lost it.  I think I needed a moment to myself to really let in sink in.  Now I am OK.

And thankful for the two CRAZIES that we have and LOVE very much!


Thursday, April 17, 2014

Ninja Warriors

Last Tuesday Max and Claire started Ninja Warriors, a Taekwondo class for kids ages 3-5.  I was originally just signing Max up, then when the owner said it was 30% sibling discount, free uniform and they would be working on respect and discipline, I knew I had to sign Claire up as well.

It is so cute to watch.  All the kids love to say, "hiya" and look at themselves in the mirror.  Max loves it and does pretty well.... as long as he is not following what his sister is doing.  Claire... well, she's Claire! She kind of does her own thing.  Taekwondo is not her thing!


Today was their first day to wear their outfits.  Claire refused.  She insisted on this random pajama shirt and soft pants.  Wasn't going to fight it.  She ended up sitting on my lap half the class.


Ninja Max!
In other news....
today I went to the gym for the first time in a month!  I just walked at a medium pace for 40 minutes.  It felt so good to be back in there!  Can't wait to really get back!  I have my post op follow up next Wednesday. I'll feel more comfortable adding activity once I meet with my doctor.

Thursday, April 10, 2014

First Dentist Appointment!

Max and Claire had their first dentist appointment this past Monday.  I wasn't sure how they would do.... actually, I thought Claire would do great bc she was the volunteer when the dentist came to their school.
Well, they both did fantastic!  I was so proud of both of them.  The office is VERY kid friendly.  There were flat screen TVs everywhere and they were playing Frozen.  They also got to wear sunglasses while they had their cleaning and it was super quick.
They were both squeaky clean!






Also, I wanted to thank you all for your sweet comments.  I am feeling so much better!  

Sunday, April 6, 2014

And they're gone

Friday morning I woke up with severe pain.  I had a doctor's appointment that afternoon, but I could not wait.  I went in, had an ultrasound and found out the "mass" had doubled in size and I had internal bleeding.... So surgery it was.  I got to the hospital around 10 and was in surgery by 10:45 and was in there just under two hours.  I had laparoscopic surgery and now have three incisions to add to my c-section scar.

While the Dr. was in, she checked out my other fallopian tube.  It was in poor condition, so she removed it as well.  It's kind of weird. Friday went by so fast and is such a blur.  I'm feeling better, just sore from surgery.  Max and Claire went to Charlotte to spend time with Grandma, Grandpa and Aunt Darcy, leaving some quiet time for us.  Last night two friends dropped off dinner and dessert.  I really have the best friends and family


Thursday, April 3, 2014

Pain

I'm in pain.  A lot.  So much that last night I had to go to hospital.  Around 6:30 I started getting shooting pains and was very tender on my right side (that's where the "mass" is).  I waited an hour and the pain never went away, so off we went.  I had to do more blood work and another u/s.  The "mass" is still the same size and my HCG levels have dropped a little bit. 

This morning when I woke up I was still in a lot of pain.  So much that it hurt to walk, drive and sit - basically anything you use your core for, hurt. Thankfully the kids were in school until 1, so I rested at home and they took a good nap when we got home.  I have a follow up appointment tomorrow afternoon with more blood work and another u/s.  So ready for this to be OVER.

I keep hoping I'm in a nightmare and I'll wake up and everything is ok.

I did see scripture from 2 Corinthians someone posted on Instagram and it made me feel better.
This section spoke to me
"I also send trials into your life.  When you trust Me in the midst of trouble, Peace flourishes and weeds die away.  Thank me for troublesome situations; the Peace they can produce far outweighs the trials you endure"

Praying for comfort and good news tomorrow!

Monday, March 31, 2014

Round TWO

Got my levels back today.  No bueno.  The HCG hormone had gone up by 4000.  Meaning I still had ectopic pregnancy.  Once my results came in, they sent me to the hospital for an ultrasound.  I had to see the on call doctor for our practice and apparently there was some miscommunication and I was there 4.5 hours!  I finally got the MTX injection at 10:45 and headed home.  Thankful for my Mom and Justin.  Mom came over straight from work so Justin could come with me.

I'll go back for more blood work Thursday and Sunday to see if this dose is working.  I really pray it is bc I do not want to have to go through surgery. I'm ready to move on.

Luckily these two have been able to distract me!



Tuesday, March 25, 2014

No words

I was hoping to be posting about this:


But today, when I went in for my first ultrasound, they found that I had an ectopic pregnancy.  I was in shock.  Complete shock.
I found out two weeks ago that we were pregnant.  If you know my past, you know that I struggled with infertility for a few years, then after 3 failed IUI and 1 IVF, Max and Claire were born.  So you can imagine how surprised and excited I was to be finding out we had gotten pregnant ON OUR OWN!  I immediately called my OB and had blood work.... then had it two more times to check my HCG levels.  I had my last call this morning saying they had risen nicely....
I could tell almost immediately that something was wrong during the u/s. The tech wasn't saying much or answering my questions. Surprisingly, I have not been in a lot of pain.  I would just be around six weeks.
After finding out, I had to go to the hospital to get blood work then was given a Methotrexate injection. This stops the pregnancy from growing. {insert tears}.  I'll go back for more blood work Saturday and next Tuesday, and then weekly until no pregnancy hormone is detected.
I've had a few friends experience a miscarriage, but I don't think you can truly understand the sadness til you go through it yourself.
I know God has a plan, a much bigger plan, but that doesn't make me feel better right now.  I just keep thinking about how excited I was two Thursdays ago.  We just told our parents this past Friday.  Their reactions were priceless. And now.... ugh... this just sucks.

Sorry for such a depressing post.. just needed to get it off my chest.