It's not easy being a mom. I knew it was going to be hard, but didn't realize it was going to be this hard! Maybe today really hit me for a couple of reasons: it was a beautiful Saturday, I had a lot of errands to run, it was my friend's bachelorette party, I saw a couple in the grocery store flirting, and Max and Claire were fussy.
In the past, if we had a day like today, I would have spent most of the day outside....well that's hard to do when you have a baby, or in our case two! Yes, we could have gone on a family walk - BUT we are trying so hard to be on a schedule and I know if we went on a walk they would fall asleep. I don't want that to be their nap time and if we go after they eat, when they are supposed to be awake - they would fall asleep.
Errands - I needed to go to Costco, Babies R Us, Vitamin store and a few other places. I left after their lunch feeding and had a little over 1.5 hrs to get back before their next feeding. I feel guilty leaving Justin by himself when they are awake. During the week, I don't have the extra hand to be able to go run errands when I need to so that leaves me with the weekends.
A friend was having her bachelorette party tonight and I spent the night with fussy babies (that are now sleeping soundly!) I know they are having so much fun!
Now the last one is what really got me... the couple flirting in the grocery store. (I actually knew them, but tried not to let them see my in my frumpy sweatpants) they reminded me of Justin and I over three years ago. It seems it has been that long since we had the fun flirty stage. Soon after we got married we started trying to conceive, then went through our fertility struggle, then gave birth to our precious babies. I miss the little sweet kisses, random notes, hand holding, flirting, going out last minute with friends, getting dressed in something besides sweatpants or pjs......
BUT I wouldn't change our lives for anything. Max and Claire mean the world to me and I love them more than they will every know!
It's ok for mommies to have a moment and dream about a full night sleep, time out with the girls and fun times with the hubs!