Monday, May 25, 2015

Real Talk

Now that Kate is three weeks old and the newness is starting to go away (well a little), the baby blues have kicked in.  I cry a lot. I'm sure it's not all postpartum, but also has to deal with having house on the market and trying to find time to move into the rental,  trying to pay a lot of attention to Max and Claire, and learning a new routine for our new family of five.  Three is hard.  I texted a few of my friends that have three kids yesterday asking if it got easier.  I wouldn't trade my life for anything in the world, but three is kicking my butt! I'm sure things will get easier (or I will just get used to) once we figure out a new routine.

I remember feeling overwhelmed and weepy around the same time with Max and Claire.

Claire is helpful most of the time, the rest of the time she is in Kate's face or begging to hold her.

Buds can be helpful, but stays out of her way for the most part.  Occasionally, he wants to help feed her, but only last one minute.

Kate and I are still working on breastfeeding.  It has gotten a little better.  I went back to the lactation consultant and she was helpful once again.  She said I really need to be breastfeeding at least four times a day for her to get the practice and hang of things.  We still use a bottle for when she is super hungry, or I'm not here, and the late night/early morning feedings.  I think she is having a growth spurt.  She has gotten better for the most part.  Sometimes it takes a few minutes to get the latch correct, but once she does, she is good for about 20 minutes and that makes me very happy.

Yesterday started out rough for me.  I was excited, we were all up and getting ready for church, thought I was ahead of the game and had an outfit picked out.... thought being key word.  I went for a more flowy dress, went to put it on, and NOPE it made me look like a sausage, def. not flowy.  I ended up in tears. I hate this in between stage.  I have lost about 24 of the 40 I gained, but am very wide still.  Finally found a black dress to wear and had a cardigan to help cover.  I'm really upset bc one of the dresses I had tried on, was one I was going to wear to a wedding this weekend.  Now I am going to have to buy a new outfit that I will probably only wear once. UGH.

After church we packed up and went to the pool.  We are members of two, one being in a neighboring city (for justin's golf) and that is the one we went to.  Of course, it is 50 minutes away so that meant extra packing.  I did the best I could to prepare for a day trip there.  I pumped, packed bottles, fed Kate, packed lunches, dry clothes, packed pump and extra bottles... After the hour it took to get ready, we were headed out.  By the time we got there it was almost time to feed Kate again.  I was determined to breastfeed so I didn't have to get out the dreaded pump, but she had other plans.  More breast milk ended up on her and her face than in her mouth.  I was so irritated.  So, bottle it was, then I had to find a place to pump. This one has to have an outlet.  The ladies room didn't have any outlets, so I asked the teenage lifeguards if I could use their guard room to pump.  They let me, but probably had no idea what it meant when I said I needed to pump!

The kids had a great time swimming and playing with their cousins.  After the pool, Justin took Max to hit golf balls for the first time.  It was super cute!


4 comments:

  1. Big hugs to you!!! I can't even imagine what life with 3 is life and despite the bumps in the road I have no doubt you are rocking it!!!!!!

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  2. You are doing a great job, Kelly!! I did the same thing when Camden was a few weeks old and cried a lot. I felt like I couldn't give Cohen enough of my time with always nursing Camden or tending to all his needs. Breastfeeding is hard work and especially if you are having to pump too. I struggled with breastfeeding the whole year I did it so if you need any help, please call or text me!! XOXO

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  3. I can't believe you guys are getting out and doing as much as you are, so you deserve a big high five for that right there!! You will definitely get the hang of things and I'm sure some days won't be as great as others. I hope the good outweigh the bad though and you guys get in a groove with everything. I still find myself crying some days. It's hard!

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  4. Hang in there. I've been following your instagram posts with admiration thinking "wow, she's amazing to be able to do all this with 3 kids". No words of advise from me, just a big hug

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